Saturday mid-morning and my phone was on fire! In the spate of just a few minutes, I received more than 30 WhatsApp messages, several of them via various local group chats.
Reports that the Prodigal Prince and his bride might be settling among us somewhere here in the Cotswolds were starting to sink in.
‘I hope they aren’t going to make life awkward in the lanes with their security detail,’ huffed one contributor.
‘They’d better not make drop-off at school a drag, I have to get to work,’ agreed another.
‘Has she even heard of Daylesford? We have the real deal – in-date organic-jam here,’ joked yet another.
My head was spinning. Because what did this mean for me? Given my trenchant views on the Sussexes – shared in this column – was I about to become NFI to social gatherings?
As people rushed to bag a duke and duchess for their kitchen suppers, would I be persona non grata now? Would I ever again need to put in the heated rollers, don my glad rags and paint my face?
Maybe it was time to get a cat and prepare myself for weekends in front of the fire, alone with my memories of how it used to be, all clinking glasses, canapes and hot gossip.
Nadine Dorries, who lives in the Cotswolds, says local group chats were abuzz after the news broke that Harry and Meghan may be moving to the area
My daughters didn’t help.
‘Mum, you are so going to rue the day you ever wrote about Harry and Meghan,’ texted one.
Another wrote: ‘I wouldn’t be buying any new Christmas party frocks if I were you, Mum. They won’t leave the wardrobe.’ Both messages were followed by a string of laughing emojis.
‘My life is ruined,’ I wailed.
So, are the Sussexes coming? Nothing is certain but nothing is secret in these tiny villages where the long-time Cotswolds proper live.
We know who lives in which grand house and what’s on – or secretly off – the market. We know the schools that would pass muster for a little prince and princess. Yes, it’s all speculation but I think we have it sussed.
Will they fit in if, and when, they arrive? As it happens, I did attend a smart drinks party on Saturday evening and it’s fair to say that loyalties lie firmly in the courts of the King and Queen, and William and Kate.
No one has forgotten the things Harry wrote about Camilla in his memoir, Spare. He described her as ‘evil’ and ‘dangerous’. The Queen has a strong following here and I’m firmly in her corner, as are many others. We want to see the Sussexes seek forgiveness, which requires repentance, before we welcome them into the fold.
Of course, we’re fairly used to A-list celebrities around here. We have Jeremy Clarkson and his partner Lisa Hogan, David and Victoria Beckham, and – after rumour and counter-rumour – Beyonce and Jay Z have reportedly moved in and have been spotted at the local garden centre. There’s Simon Cowell, Damien Hirst, Liam Gallagher… etc
We know how to behave around royals, too. I occasionally find myself at the same local social gatherings as Queen Camilla or some of the younger royals. When it’s the Queen, I always make a point of absenting myself from the group, so she feels free to chat. I’m a columnist for the best-selling newspaper in Britain but I’d never repeat a single word I heard her say. I don’t want her to feel uncomfortable.
We lock eyes from the distance I put between us, and she gives me an almost imperceptible nod of the head as she smiles her thanks.
![One resident texted, 'Has she even heard of Daylesford [Farm Shop] (pictured)? We have the real deal – in-date organic-jam here,' poking fun at Meghan's lifestyle brand, As Ever](https://i.dailymail.com/1s/2026/08/24/15/110819589-16076053-image-a-137_1787580859849.jpg)
One resident texted, ‘Has she even heard of Daylesford [Farm Shop] (pictured)? We have the real deal – in-date organic-jam here,’ poking fun at Meghan’s lifestyle brand, As Ever
Nadine sometimes finds herself at the same social gatherings as Queen Camilla: ‘She has a strong following here and I’m firmly in her corner, as are many others’
I once had the honour of spending time alone with the nuclear Royal Family, and I was struck by what a normal bunch they are in how they interact – full of banter. They are also hugely affectionate towards each other. I’m not exaggerating when I say that love leapt from the King’s eyes as he and Prince William took the mickey out of each other, just like any father and son.
Which is why Harry’s cruel and bizarre behaviour has been such an abhorrent anathema to me. How could he do what he did to his loving family and how could he so hurt our late Queen, even as her husband – his grandfather – was dying, with his vicious accusations? It’s the question everyone around my patch wants the answer to.
If Harry or Meghan are reading this, you should know that here in the Cotswolds we aren’t in the least bit dazzled by stardust, even the royal variety. You will be afforded privacy and respect if you live among us. We want you and your children to be happy. But airs and graces and a sense of entitlement won’t go down well. Half of the people who live here would regard your bank balance as small change.
Oh, and I’ll probably bump into you in the Chipping Norton Aldi one day soon where you might just find me chatting to David Cameron in the middle aisle. Welcome both.
